Hollywood is very good at buying up ideas and then turning them into bad films or television shows. Often, the final product bears little resemblance to the source material that inspired it, sharing only a name. In other cases, the studio completely messes up the casting, putting in popular “names” whether they fit or not, resulting in a film that neither the die hard fans of the source material nor the uninitiated really like. Today, we’ll focus on “Bad Casting”.
Let’s take a look at the Japanese cult phenomenon Death Note and see how Hollywood could ruin it with lousy casting:
Light Yagami: Light Yagami is the anti-hero of Death Note; a typical Japanese teenager who gets his hands on a book that kills anyone whose name is written inside of it. At first, Light (whose murderous alter-ego is named Kira) uses it to kill just criminals. Soon, however, he begins killing the police force who are given the task of capturing him. With this sinister backstory, Hollywood is certain to assign a worthy actor to the task of playing such a complex character. Of course, this means that Zac Efron is the perfect choice!
L: The mysterious L is enlisted to capture Kira and quickly makes Light his number one suspect. L is an eccentric genius, who seems to be a shut in, has problems interacting with other people and is a sugar freak. Despite his bizarre proclivities, L became a hero in Japan, which was a shame since [SPOILER ALERT] he ends up dead in the original Manga, Anime and live action feature length film. Our guess? Hollywood won’t make the same mistake, keeping L alive and casting someone who can realistically play a complex genius, Shia LeBeouf!!
Ryuk (Voice Only): Ryuk is a “shinigami”, an angel of death who can kill people by writing their names in his Death Note. He is invisible to most humans, appearing solely to people who have touched his Death Note. Bored with the routine of “killing” people when it is their time to die, Ryuk drops his Death Note upon unsuspecting Light Yagami just to see what happens. There’s only one actor with a distinct enough voice to play an angel of death- Gilbert Gottfried!!
Misa Misa: Misa Misa is a popular Japanese celebrity whose parents were killed in a brutal rampage. After Kira kills the man who murdered her family, she becomes a devoted fan. When she stumbles upon the Death Note of a shinigami who risked his life to save her, she becomes a second Kira, killing criminals with the hope that she will get to flush out the “real” Kira and team up with him to kill criminals. This being a Japanese story, Misa Misa is a complete idiot like just about every woman in Japanese pop culture, but she does succeed in finding out who the real Kira is. Who would be perfect to play the bubble-headed Misa Misa? Could it be Hilary Duff? (Come to think of it, that probably isn’t that much of a stretch.)
So, trust us when we say that the diehard Death Note fans would probably take up arms were these casting decisions made. Well, at the very least, they’d probably register their disdain on a blog or something… So, pleasing neither the true fans nor the general public, this version of Death Note would probably be an instant failure. So, if you’re just going to waste $100 Million-plus, Hollywood, why not throw that money at us? Ralphland: The Movie! has a nice ring to it. It couldn’t be worse than a Uwe Boll film, right?
